HELLO GOODBYE

I think Im finally awaken.

I realised its too much for me to handle, when I keep hanging on to the wasted past thinking that time will go back to the way we were before. I thought I gave you up when I left, leaving you to fend for yrself. I thought we both moved on after awhile. I thought we were both doing fine. Until tt day, I thought im your everything cos you were there no matter what, no matter when. I thought you love me still. I thought there will be a chance for us to get back together. I thought we can love the way we did again. I thought you are my happiness which i lost along the way. Most importantly, i thought you were still you.

But I failed to see that things had changed. I failed to see the life you lead now. I failed to see the difference between us. You want fun and freedom. You want friends and nightlife. You want drinks, drinks, and more drinks. Den why did you even come back in the first place? Do you rather your forever to be nightlife or to be me? Do u rather your future to consist of fun, fun and more fun instead of me. Im not asking you to give up anything for me. cos I know now its impossible to stop you from everything now. But are you intending to lead your life like that forever? By giving me up now, you chose to have your fun and lose me forever. You rather let me go.

You said time is playing us. I agree. When you love me, I did'nt felt anything. and I left. When u wanted me back. I did'nt want to cos everything's happening too fast. Then you drifted away. But now its me who wants you back. Yet you're not prepared for anything. cause fun n freedom is all you're concern abt. You want nothing to tie you down. and knowing our difference. I will. You say we will have a hard time together. I use to think we can overcome all, as long as there is love. but to you, thats being blinded.

So much things I have to tell you. the life i wanna lead with you. But I could see almost nothing at all. Now the ball's in your court. I've done my everything and I have no regrets. If you chose to give me up, den I promise myself I will too. I figure it will be hard to do so. really hard. but if loving you becomes such a chore more than a bliss, den I will.

Cause I finally understand how to let go.

FOOEETING, EDITH